gonnawreckit | 300m [Voice]

Hey. Um, Luceti guys. I need to talk to all about something. I don't know exactly how to start off, but... You know what? I'll just get out with it.

What's the deal with kids around here? I don't want anything to do with 'em, but at the rate they wind up trying to "be my friend", I'll wind up with a gaggle of 'em following me everywhere in no time! I don't get it. I try being nice. I try being mean. Nothing works in keeping 'em away from me! I'm not fit to do that much babysitting. I'm a bad guy for crying out loud!

I mean... okay, I'm not bad most of the time, and there is one kid I'm kinda lookin' out for. But that's it! That's where I want it to stop. Just one kid! That's my limit. I don't need any more of a headache from the rest of these little gremlins running around when there's a village full of responsible adults and oddly enough teenagers who should be able to handle them much better than me. So what is it? What's the secret, to getting brats to stay away from me?

[He really could care less about the lack of a filter.

And okay maybe you find him browsing the item shop for familiar items from video games, or going to watch Vanellope race at the Battle Dome.]

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Or they'll keep coming back for more. The little grubbers are addicted!

But why not just play with them for a bit? I'm sure they're just lonesome without their parents.

Ur-

[He can't just defy an answer like that. It makes him feel a little bad.]

I guess I don't mind playing a little bit. But there's plenty of other older people around the kids can go to instead! I'm no good at this stuff.

Maybe you're quite good at it and you just don't realize it. I could give you some tips, if you'd like.

You do? But- No! I don't want any tips, and I don't want to be good at it.

Perhaps it's a superpower you're simply not aware of yet.

But they do enjoy games. If you gather them all up together at once, you can play tag or hide and seek or fruits basket. They really enjoy it. My new friend Precis-san and I are thinking of starting a fun and games club, perhaps you'd like to come?

It can stay hidden for all I care!

And now you want me in a whole club about this nonsense? You're barking up the wrong Deku Tree, buddy! That'll just encourage 'em more!

Oh! I didn't realize you wanted to keep the children occupied aaaaaall by yourself. I'm sorry for intruding~

N-no, I don't! You take 'em all for yourselves... with your little club! Then I'll have a lot less headaches on my hand.

I don't know... They might not want to play with me since I'm a stranger if someone they already know and feel comfortable around isn't there to watch.

Then you give 'em candy!

It wouldn't be right to take candy from a stranger.

Well I'm not supposed to be the most reliable dispenser of candy, myself/

Why do you say that? You seem rather nice.

Well I'm programmed to be a bad guy, y'know. Even when I'm off-duty, like my whole time here, I don't think I'm exactly role model material.

Pro...gram...med....? [Yeah, what is technology. Even now he doesn't really understand it all since he doesn't have to.]

History says I'm a bad guy, too. But I don't really feel all that bad. Unless, you do feel bad. Then I suppose it isn't an issue.

You heard me, bub. You know, with codes and all.

You don't look all that bad, either. If you asked me, you've got "annoying protagonist" written all over you. Or maybe "annoyingly cheery sidekick". What's the worst you could even do, Bathrobe?

Oh! [Codes! Yes, okay he can work with this.] So your codes of conduct say you must be a bad guy?

[MMMMMMMMMMMMMM what does he say to that? He laughs as he considers whether or not to traumatize this guy.] I am a samurai. I kill people. And I'm very good at it.

Something like that.

[And pause a moment as he freaks out at that. Such a...cheery bad guy.]

Ooookay. You win this one.

If I had a choice I don't think I would do this forever, but my country is at war and I must do my duty.

If you had a choice, what would you do?

Oh. Well when you put it like that, it sounds more... hero-y.

If I had a choice? If I had a choice. [He pauses for a moment, to think it out.] If I had a choice... I dunno, maybe I'd be something else.

To the other side, however, I'm simply a murderer and a dog of the shogunate. Interesting how perspective changes things, isn't it?

What would you like to be if you were something else?

I guess so. But it's only the good side that matters in games.

Well I'd - do I wanna have this conversation? I mean, what if were the hero? [He tries to throw in casually.] What if... that?

Is it? I would think both sides are the sides that matter. You can't have a game of tag without the demon chasing the villagers after all. Without him, it just looks silly as people run from nothing.

[Because seriously, how do you even play that game without a demon??]

What sort of hero would you want to be, if you were the hero?

Of course both sides matter. The demon's got his role to play, and he does it darn well. But I mean, it's the hero that people really pay attention to.

Well, huh... I dunno. I'd kinda like to still be a wrecker, but maybe in a more constructive way. The kind that'd wreck bad guys and live in mansion or something. I guess I'd look after the brat, too. Just not a whole flock of 'em.

voice;

ahappylie - 2013-03-14 04:13 (UTC) - Expand

gonnawreckit - 2013-03-21 07:32 (UTC) - Expand

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