300m [Voice]

[gonnawreckit]

Hey. Um, Luceti guys. I need to talk to all about something. I don't know exactly how to start off, but... You know what? I'll just get out with it.

What's the deal with kids around here? I don't want anything to do with 'em, but at the rate they wind up trying to "be my friend", I'll wind up with a gaggle of 'em following me everywhere in no time! I don't get it. I try being nice. I try being mean. Nothing works in keeping 'em away from me! I'm not fit to do that much babysitting. I'm a bad guy for crying out loud!

I mean... okay, I'm not bad most of the time, and there is one kid I'm kinda lookin' out for. But that's it! That's where I want it to stop. Just one kid! That's my limit. I don't need any more of a headache from the rest of these little gremlins running around when there's a village full of responsible adults and oddly enough teenagers who should be able to handle them much better than me. So what is it? What's the secret, to getting brats to stay away from me?

[He really could care less about the lack of a filter.

And okay maybe you find him browsing the item shop for familiar items from video games, or going to watch Vanellope race at the Battle Dome.]

Comments

[voice]

[gonnawreckit]

A professor, huh! Most professors I know're mad scientists, but it sounds like you're more of the history type yourself.

[voice]

[reminded]

The archaeology type, to be precise. Strange... Most professors I know aren't mad scientists.

[voice]

[gonnawreckit]

One of those cave jumpers, huh? I hear that's pretty exciting. The guy from Pitfall always raves about it. [To other people. Whenever he eavesdrops at Tapper's.] But, huh... not many mad scientists, huh? Then what kinds of bad guys do you have?

[voice]

[reminded]

...

Well... I suppose the "bad guys" I've encountered have been rather heavily involved with science. [And many might describe them as mad......] But a professor should be dedicated to the illumination of the mind. Not so much the disturbance of peace.

[voice]

[gonnawreckit]

Yeah, that's true and all, but that doesn't make made scientists any less popular bad guys. And, hey, someone's gotta disturb the peace to keep things interesting.

[reminded]

You make it sound like an obligation.

[gonnawreckit]

Well it's my job, Professor Tophat, so it kinda is one.

[reminded]

The disruption of peace is your job? [He does not compute.]

[gonnawreckit]

Oh, yeah! Haven't you gotten the memo, guy? I'm a bad guy. Been one for thirty years now.

[reminded]

[Thirty years...?] You seem a decent enough fellow to me. Either way, I find it curious that you describe it as your "job". Are you a performer, perhaps?

[gonnawreckit]

I... guess you could say that? I am kind of a performer. In a platformer. You know, video games.

[reminded]

...?

[He does not know.]

[gonnawreckit]

Ugh, you don't know, do you. You know, like little... computer games.

[reminded]

... [People play games on computers? Well, maybe he could see someone programming a puzzle game or something similar. With... movie elements, if it's a 'video' game?]

So an actor, essentially.

[gonnawreckit]

I guess you could call it acting...

[reminded]

No? Then is there an element of reality involved?

[Just figuring out this man's profession is becoming a puzzle in itself.]

[gonnawreckit]

I mean, I really wreck the building, and I really get tossed off of it when the player wins. But the whole time... we all kind of are acting out our roles.

[reminded]

[He thinks he's beginning to understand... no he isn't]

But it is in the name of entertainment. I suppose I could see the fun in that.

[gonnawreckit]

Yeah, well... It's supposed to be fun! Give one a try if you find one around. Should be some to play at the rec center, Dr. Tophat.

[reminded]

Maybe I will. My name is Hershel Layton, by the way.

[gonnawreckit]

Wreck-It Ralph.

[reminded]

[He wonders if that's spelled the way it sounds...]

A pleasure, Wreck-It. Do tell me how your attempts go.