300m [Voice]

[gonnawreckit]

Hey. Um, Luceti guys. I need to talk to all about something. I don't know exactly how to start off, but... You know what? I'll just get out with it.

What's the deal with kids around here? I don't want anything to do with 'em, but at the rate they wind up trying to "be my friend", I'll wind up with a gaggle of 'em following me everywhere in no time! I don't get it. I try being nice. I try being mean. Nothing works in keeping 'em away from me! I'm not fit to do that much babysitting. I'm a bad guy for crying out loud!

I mean... okay, I'm not bad most of the time, and there is one kid I'm kinda lookin' out for. But that's it! That's where I want it to stop. Just one kid! That's my limit. I don't need any more of a headache from the rest of these little gremlins running around when there's a village full of responsible adults and oddly enough teenagers who should be able to handle them much better than me. So what is it? What's the secret, to getting brats to stay away from me?

[He really could care less about the lack of a filter.

And okay maybe you find him browsing the item shop for familiar items from video games, or going to watch Vanellope race at the Battle Dome.]

Comments

voice;

[ahappylie]

[...lmao this is hilarious. Souji is totes into trolling this guy now, oops]

Mm~ Maybe if you gave them candy, they'd leave you alone for awhile?

voice;

[gonnawreckit]

Or they'll keep coming back for more. The little grubbers are addicted!

[Written]

[complicatedliar]

They get along rather well with me too.

[Written]

[gonnawreckit]

[He takes the time to reply in untidy scrawl.]

Annoying, right?

[Voice]

[kingofwaste]

[Oswald listens with Ralph's rambling with a thoughtful expression.]

So what you're sayin' is that you're gettin' a lot of pushy fans, but as a bad guy, you're not supposed to get along with 'm. So you do your thing and act like a jerk, but that just makes them like you even more?

[Voice]

[gonnawreckit]

I... guess? But... Hey, I never said I liked them! I just... All these kids gotta have better things to do!

[sugarglitch]

[A certain someone's racing at the battle dome! She's done this course before - she's just trying to beat her high score by driving at increasingly fast speeds and taking sharper, dangerous curves. Being from a racing game is neat stuff, she never really has to worry about health meters or extra lives!]

[gonnawreckit]

[And Ralph is there, quietly cheering her on... but fretting over the riskier maneuvers.]

[spohkh]

Why do you experience such contrary emotions towards children?

[gonnawreckit]

They're little, and grubby, and annoying, and they never know when to stop talking.

voice

[heartisabattleground]

Hey, kids aren't that bad, Ralph.

[What'd he mean bad guy though?]

You don't seem like much of a bad guy in my opinion.

voice

[gonnawreckit]

Uh... sure, thanks, kid. But hey, if they don't drive you up a tree, that's fine for you! But me? I got my limits.

voice

[acuity]

How rude! Thinking of children like myself as gremlins or brats... I can't understand why any would tolerate an attitude like yours.

[ <-- BRAT!! ]

voice

[gonnawreckit]

Me neither! It's honestly baffling.

[voice]

[reminded]

Ha ha, that's quite the predicament. I've found that nothing dampens a child's enthusiasm more thoroughly than an old-fashioned lecture.

[voice]

[gonnawreckit]

Finally a real answer! That sounds just boring enough to work.

[misterbrief]

Why don't you just try swatting the pests away? That usually works for me.

[gonnawreckit]

What, like... hitting them? That's the kind of line I'm trying not to cross here, bucko.

voice;

[oftheyin]

I am sorry if they make you uncomfortable, but you are a very kind and supportive person. It is nice to be around someone who is so determined to cheer you on.

But... I don't see you as a bad guy. [Don't call yourself that! You're nice Ralph.]

voice;

[gonnawreckit]

T-thanks, Ranny. But that's beside the point. I'm just not for kids.

[It's a good thing this is voice, so he can't be seen blushing.]

[voice]

[godbent]

You can count how many kids there are here on two hands, how's that even matter?

[voice]

[gonnawreckit]

I coulda sworn there were more [Or keeps on encountering de-aged people] but that's still too many.

[doubleppk]

Tell me about. Kids are such a pain, and they always just seem drawn to the kind that don't want them around. It's like they can smell it.

[gonnawreckit]

I know, right? What's their deal?

voice;

[gleamed]

What's wrong with kids?

[BIG, FAKE POUT.]

voice;

[gonnawreckit]

To start... How about, um, everything? They never know when to shut up, they're all over the place and they just love infuriating me.

[fourteen]

Hehe. I keep telling you! You're really a nice guy. It's no wonder a lot of kids like you! [ Giggling. ]

[gonnawreckit]

Like you? [Sigh.]

[Video]

[thrillthirsty]

Killing off a few might help.

[He's totally joking. Totally. Is he? This deadpan face is hard to read and he knows it.]

[Video]

[gonnawreckit]

See, people like you are the problem. Making me look good just in contrast!

[Voice]

[knightofratatosk]

Are there really that many little kids around here? I can only think of a few myself...

[Voice]

[gonnawreckit]

I don't have a running count or anything, but it seemed like quite a few! Well... At least one of 'em's sprung up to be 18 "again" since then so that could make it kind of hard to take a census. But my point still stands!

[Video]

[thebellthatbinds]

[Sabriel's only come back to herself today so she's been spending a little time on the journals catching up with what she's missed when she comes across Ralph's entry. It takes a moment for her to place a name and face to the voice but when she doesn't she can't help but feel a little flustered and guilty. Oh dear...did she really push him that far out of his comfort zone? She doesn't know what that whole 'bad guy' talk is about but at least she can apologize for it.]

I'm sorry if I imposed on you before Ralph, I never meant to be a burden to you.

[Video]

[gonnawreckit]

[Something about this girl's really familiar, but he's just not definite.]

Whaddya mean? Do we, uh... know each other?

[voice] latest ever shhh

[nothisbrother]

[God can sympathize with this guy a bit, except he doesn't want any kids to look after]

If there was a secret to keeping those annoying brats [read: Yotsuba] away, I'd be one short by now. You best get used to those headaches.

[voice] god is never late

[gonnawreckit]

Sheesh. Maybe it'd be easier to just try pawning them off on someone else. Like one of those hero types.

[voice] here have another late tag because I felt this was relevant to him too

[devourthemfirst]

[It's hard to say Czes is much of a kid when you get to know him and understand he's like a grumpy old man and 200+ years old but he can sure as hell put on an act and troll this guy]

Gee, Mister, that isn't very nice! What do you have against kids?

[voice] knock yourself out!

[gonnawreckit]

[He only feels a little bad from how young this kid sounds.]

They're just not for me, okay? And maybe a big majority of 'em are brats.